BESTSELF™ ICEBREAKER | Life Lessons 14

WHAT DECISION ARE YOU GRATEFUL YOU DIDN'T MAKE? 

Most of the big decisions made over the course of my life (prior to 2011) were made by others, and always after my initial rejection, I capitulated because the exhaustive fight simply wasn’t worth the relentless bad behaviour (guilt, shame, blame, judgment, gaslighting) of those forcing me to live a life they believed would most benefit me - or, in some cases, them. I prefer to believe that most orchestration/manipulation was not done out of malice, but all was done without consideration of my agency.

Of course, decisions set things in motion and then you spend time managing the dominoes as they fall.

My life became my own a little over a decade ago, so that’s the context from which I’m looking to find a decision I’m grateful I didn’t make. After a few weeks of considering this prompt, I can’t come up with anything. For every decision I’ve made, I’m grateful for the lesson it held. I made the best choice available with the information I had at the time. Do I have regrets? Of course, I do. I don’t believe you can live a fulfilled life without them.

There are a few things I look back at - my “crystal ball” moments. As in, if I had a crystal ball maybe I wouldn’t have done this, but I might have done that. I can’t live my life that way - none of us can. History can only be changed by going forward with an understanding of the lessons learned.