BESTSELF™ ICEBREAKER | Exposed 18

WHAT'S YOUR INSTINCTIVE REACTION WHEN SOMEONE OR SOMETHING HURTS YOU?

Of the traditional choices of fight, flight, freeze, and fawn, I suppose my immediate reaction is either fight or fawn. My therapist assures me that those two often go hand-in-hand and are part of a deep trauma response. I’ll likely have that trauma and responses until I die, but I no longer put myself in situations where I’m at risk of any of those responses, and should I discover that I am, I extricate myself as quickly as possible.

Years ago, when I was less healed, I would have lashed out and tried to hurt the one who hurt me. Once I learned that the only thing I can control in life is me and my responses to people and events, things changed. I also learned that people are working through their own trauma responses; most things “done to me” had absolutely zero to do with me.

My being sensitive, kind, generous, and empathetic no longer needs to be hidden as weaknesses. I don’t have to get a thicker skin or armour up; I can be me, and react accordingly.