REAL RIGHT NOW | Brave
“Brave” was the guiding word I chose for 2021. I needed it, every day. I have to admit that the last 2+ years have been, for the most part, a challenge. Last year was particularly difficult.
Above and beyond the global pandemic; the loss of my Anam Cara, a man I loved with my whole being for most of my life; the non-Hodgkin lymphoma diagnosis for my youngest; the purchase of a new home and move from my town of over 20 years, twice; the repeated testing for breast cancer (scar tissue) and biopsies to determine whether a hysterectomy was necessary (it’s not); the cruel and public cutting of me out of my mother’s will (more a reflection of her than me); and, the gall bladder/hernia surgery. I felt like I was regularly treading water. It was exhausting.
I recently read a quote that resonated with me:
“There are four things in this life that will change you.
Love, music, art, and loss.
The first three will keep you wild and full of passion.
May you allow the last to make you brave.”
I don’t know that I could have navigated any of my current circumstances without the loving presence then loss of Bill. The knowledge of the unconditional love, trust, and respect we had for each other fed and supported my need to feel worthy and desired. I am more confident now, because of his unconditional acceptance and love, that I can deal with absolutely anything thrown at me. What a turn-around! I’ve spent my life apologizing for the bad behaviour of others and now a dead man is giving me strength.
I am brave. I am brave beyond measure.
I no longer suffer fools. I no longer allow the agenda of others to trump my truth. I no longer allow anyone to test my boundaries.
I know I’m ready for all that is meant for me in 2022 and beyond.